I would like to think cannabis smokers are like most people. We go through the same changes, manifestations and evolutions. We learn we adapt, we grow and hopefully, at the end of the day, we are tad bit wiser than we first awoke on this large rock.
When it comes to smoking weed our preferences often change as we age. We might vacillate between smoking bowls and blunts only to switch to strictly smoking cannabis oils or cannabis flowers in vegan hemp wraps when we hit our 30’s. Or we might drastically cut back on our weed intake altogether, one never knows.
Now that I’m firmly a Gen X stoner I can honestly say I’m kind of done with smoking bowls and communal smoking. I like to session what I want when I want without taking others’ tolerances into consideration. And if I have to spend another 30 minutes of my life tediously scrapping black muck out of my glass piece like I have the world’s dirtiest job I will scream.
But change also has a funny way of happening when you least expect it. After I chucked my glass piece in frustration last month I found myself in possession of Genius Pipe, a rather simple yet highly functional metal pipe that can take as many lickings as the sadistic stoner in you can dish out.
- Standard 0.75” screen
- Magnetic sliding cover
- Dimpled Bowl and Base
How to Use Your Genius Pipe
To use your Genuis pipe simply slide the metal cover to reveal the Genuis Pipe bowl piece. Pack your bowl accordingly, slide your metal cover back (so that it covers the bowl) and slowly inhale through the mouthpiece. You can also smoke sans metal cover with no problems.
The Genius Pipe functions as a normal pipe would, however, it differs in several critical areas:
- Design: The Genius pipe is two slender slabs of dimpled, non-toxic magnetized anodized aluminum, which, when snapped together, form the basis of your Genius Pipe. This means no more breaking or shattering your piece and weeping over it afterward, as the Genius Pipe is effectively indestructible enough to be wielded as a weapon (if you happen to be smoking in an active war zone). The slender design means no more clogged stems that impede both the taste of your cannabis and your ability to effectively smoke. If you’re one of those folks who likes to collect resin from their bowls for when hard times abound, then this decidedly modern apparatus likely won’t do it for you.
- Cleaning: Let’s talk more about that because I can’t stress just how annoying it is to spend time painstakingly cleaning a pipe. A typical bowl (especially elaborate glass pieces) typically has curves, nooks and crannies. Trying to dig thick, odorous resin from your bowl is like trying to clean a Louisiana tar pit. It ain’t happening. Imagine if you had a piece that was shaped in a way that all you had to do was wipe it down with an alcohol swab to clean it? You can stop imagining because I’m obviously alluding to the Genius Pipe.
- Mouthpiece: The dimples that line the top and bottom of your Genuis Pipe are meant to filter smoke allowing for a cooler, less harsh hit. While the smoke I inhaled through my Genius Pipe wasn’t necessarily “cooler” it was less dense. This definitely led to a more pleasant smoking experience, if I could actually get more smoke. More about that below.
It became immediately apparent that I would have to constantly “reload” my Genius Pipe to do any real smoking. Because the bowl is so shallow it only allows for one good initial hit and few ashy ones once that first hit is done. If, as I alluded too in the opening paragraph, you don’t like to smoke communally and you have a low tolerance than the Genius Pipe is perfect for the asking price. If you’re more a social smoker than the Genius Pipe is perfect for whipping out at parties and impressing the Bros and Chads with its unique aesthetics, but not much else.
While the Genius pipe is slim enough to fit in your pants pocket you can’t help notice that it does have a bit of heft to it. This will certainly dissuade some folks with taking their Genius Pipe with them, as who wants an awkwardly sized bulge in their pants?
I plan on using my Genius Pipe for small, concentrated hits of my most potent top-shelf bud (or perhaps a kief/hash mix), as I see this as the only way an experienced smoker can have a real thoughtful session with their Genius Pipe. More of a pipe for those who just need a hit or two, I will admit the Genius Pipe does what it purports and is unique among other pipes on the market for its sheer durability and ergonomically friendly design.
My name is Petey Wheatstraw, also known as Charles Stevens. I’m an avid marijuana smoker, writer, devoted father and non-profit minion– not necessarily in that order. A Chicago native I’ve lived off and on in the Bay Area since 1996. Seven years ago I finally settled here to capture the changing face of our communities.