Bay Area Hip-Hop Artist is Running For President

Remember when Kanye West said he was running for President in 2020? Yeah neither do I. And by the way can you imagine Kanye West for President? I know Donald Trump is a sick joke played upon us by some villains in a  shadow government but the idea of Yeezy interrupting Secretary General Ban Ki-Moon at a UN Meeting like “I’ma let you finish Ki” is borderline madness.

Well it looks like someone has beaten ol’ Yeezy to the punch, which is all good and dandy I suppose, seeing as Kanye West is a Fashion Designer now who’s being discriminated against because he’s not Gay. Yes read that again carefully.

35 year old free styling phenom and  Richmond Resident  Deon Jenkins has officially thrown his hat in the presidential ring, beating Kanye by 4 years.

“I’m the youngest to legally run for president in the history of the United States of America,” Jenkins said via CBS San Francisco.

To show that he’s serious and, as he puts it, to “stand out on the ballot”, Jenkins recently changed his name to “Hip-Hop For President”.

Jenkins, sorry, Hip-Hop For President,  just filed his FEC paperwork and should have no problems standing out based on his platform, which is hip hop culture and the politics it intersects.

For example, prospective candidate Hip-Hop has plans to effect major change his first day in office.

“I’m gonna legalize marijuana,” he said via CBS San Francisco.

Jenkins said he also wants to challenge another enigmatic candidate, Donald Trump on the national stage. Jenkins plans to share his vision for free education and reparations for descendants of slaves.

However there’s just one major hurdle he has to overcome in order to actually say these things directly to Donald Trumps face. Jenkins needs three percent of the national vote, which, for all you who aren’t that great in math, is a shit-ton, just to get in on a debate.

Jenkins says he’s working hard on it and has already gotten a campaign song  developed called Giant Slayer, a jab at Trump.

But again, it’s all about getting to that debate.

“I might be the next president of the United States if I make that debate,” prospective candidate Hip-Hop said. “I’m very confident.”


Petey Wheatstraw

Hi, my name is Petey Wheatstraw. I'm an avid marijuana smoker, writer, devoted father and non-profit minion-- not necessarily in that order. A Chicago native I've lived in the Bay Area since 1996. Click Here for Free Cannabis